Friday, June 04, 2010

Paternity Test, Anyone?

I've been thinking.

I'm not sure anymore, that Xman is the father of our children.

I mean, if he was, wouldn't he feel some obligation to contribute to their health, well-being, and survival?

I know a few families who receive child support payments. Two of them receive $1000 per child per month, and another receives $600 per child per month.
Xman would like to pay less than $250 per month per child.
In California.

Apparently not making the connection that his access to his children is in imminent danger of being restricted by the mere result of forced relocation.


6/7/10 Updated for CYA legal reasons:
I also forgot to mention 2 rather relevant points:
1) Early on, Xdude made me fill out paternity papers with DCSS just to stall the case. His name is on birth certs and he does not dispute his paternity - but it was a fine way to stall with 8 more pages of paperwork and humiliating questions, such as 'when AND WHERE was the last time you had sex with this person?'
2) Xdude MYSTERIOUSLY lost his fabulous, well paying and TRACKABLE job just days after being ordered to pay child support. Now he just takes on contract work so he can hide his income.
3) There has been an order made. An order for back support and current support. He has not paid one cent of the back support, and has not once - not even one single month since being ordered - paid more than half of what he was ordered.
4) There is no doubt in their paternity. I was being facetious.

18 comments:

Jennifer said...

Okay duh wouldnt one think that he would CARE ABOUT the welfare and wellbeing of the children?!?!?!?!?!?! even if he was a stickler for documentation for how the money is spent on the kids??? In my opinion he should pay for what he has helped bring into this world and pay for the upbringing (ie food shelter, daycare, schooling, clothes, school functions ect,) and the ironic thing is my word is supper

Sophie said...

Maybe you should Dr Phil his ass? There must be a deadbeat dad ep coming soon...

fairymama said...

Ah, but there's the crux...first you "accuse" him of such things he would *never* do (or did because you provoked him!). Then you move the children across the country from him. Yes, so now he can never see them, why should he pay for them?!?

Oy. He's suck a knob (that really is the kindest thing I can come up with right now, I'm in a mood).

Table4Five said...

I know it's been forever since I stopped by here, and to read about what Xdude is doing to you and the kids, it's heartbreaking. You will always be in my thoughts.

furiousBall said...

as a single dad of two kids that live with me. this is depressing. what the hell is wrong with people? how does a father get wired that way. absolutely does not compute.

it's like we've officially reached critical mass for irresponsibility

Another Suburban Mom said...

Does California not just automatically take the wages out and send them to you. Thats what they do in MA and PA.

Does he have any idea how expensive kids are? The shoes, clothes, that food stuff and a roof over their heads.

Gretchen said...

Oh, I don't know. My divorced brother is "reorganizing his debt" in order to avoid helping to pay for his diabetic daughter's (Type I, lives with mom) medical bills that aren't covered completely by insurance. What the hell is wrong with people?

Linda said...

I got $200.00 a month child support FOR 3 KIDS! Not each. FOR ALL THREE.
He had cheated on me so many times that I wasn't sure the kids were mine! :-0

MelD said...

My ex quit his job when Social Services decided that since his child was receiving state benefits, he'd have to fork out some funds in child support. Haven't seen a penny from him in over 18 months. Go figure.

Eventually they'll court order him to pay their minimum child support payment for fathers who aren't working .... $50/month total regardless of how many children.

Evie_Edlund said...

I appreciate where you are coming from and hear your fustration. But do realize that your statement could be taken a number of ways that would weaken your stance in court.

gwendomama said...

Evie
I appreciate your input - believe me, this was carefully thought out before posted. He knows he is their father. To imply anything else would be 'facetious' - as I am being.
The moving would never happen illegally, so no worries there.

Catherine said...

Unfortunately, many men and women do not feel the need nor desire to take care of their kids. My husbands ex wife was ordered to pay $150 a month for two kids. She's not paid it in years. She has an arrest warrant doesnt work, doesnt care. but yet posts on facebook about how she and her oldest daughter (half sister to my two step kids we have full legal and physical custody of) are off getting mani pedi's and how they are eating out and doing this or that. Yeah..gee I don't know why I can't stand the woman...

Lynnbug said...

I think he is being an ass. These are his children and you would think that he would want them to have the things they need. He knows how expensive children are to raise. He just doesnt care. He is an ass. I cant say it enough. I dont care what goes on between parents when they divorce. The children come first and if he doesnt see that he is just an ass.

gwendomama said...

I also forgot to mention 2 rather relevant points:
1) Xdude made me fill out paternity papers with DCSS just to stall the case. His name is on birth certs and he does not dispute his paternity - but it was a fine way to stall with 8 more pages of paperwork and humiliating questions, such as 'when was the last time you had sex with this person?'
2) Xdude MYSTERIOUSLY lost his fabulous, well paying and TRACKABLE job just days after being ordered to pay child support. Now he just takes on contract work so he can hide his income.

Jenna said...

I wonder if his boss is in on this given your recent update. Odd...

Narya said...

Get the IRS after his sorry ass. If he's filing a tax return, then his income is presumably trackable by that. And if he's lying on his taxes? Let the IRS have at him.

**Maria ** said...

Hi Gwendomama! I've been meaning to leave this comment for you for a while. I can't seem to locate your email contact info anywhere on your site and want to send you a private message. Can you email me at manaoin@hotmail.com? Thank you! Maria

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