Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Mother of three....


Today, my invisible child would have turned 7.
He would have. If he wasn't dead, that is.



For 406 days he shared himself, full of grace, with mortals.

For 406 days, I was his mother.


Some days, it's easier to breathe than others. Some days I don't have to remind myself to draw another breath in, before exhaling everything I have, deflated like an empty shell.

24 comments:

Miss Grace said...

<3

Lauri said...

What a beautiful creature - he's lucky he had a mother with such a beautiful soul.

Anonymous said...

What a beautiful boy. I'm so sorry he's not here with you.....

furiousBall said...

lots and lots of love to you chica. i'm going to drive my children crazy tonight with lots and lots of hugs from daddy.

jennyonthespot said...

Hugs and much love from one mom to another <3

Melissa said...

What a beautiful child.
So so sorry for your loss.
Sending love you way~

h2o girl said...

He is so beautiful. He looks like an angel, truly. I'm so sorry he's not here with you.

mossum said...

{{{hug}}}

Magpie said...

You're still his mother.

maplesyrup said...

Gwen-- big big hugs to you and your little ones. For sure next time I see you.

Kathy said...

What a beautiful baby. I'm so sorry he's not still here with you, but he will always be in your heart. I can only imagine the heartbreak. :(

Sophie said...

This will sound odd coming from me... but when I look at these pics I think "I've missed seeing his face". I remember reading all about him such a long time ago, and relating much to my experience with my Jordan. I looked at his pictures so much as I read your story.

He is absolutely beautiful. xxx

mamadaisy said...

you will always be his mother.
xo

Andi S said...

He's beautiful!

And you'll always be his mother. He knows that.

heather said...

xoxox
always,
heather

Headless Mom said...

Lots of hugs and loves today, friend.

Julia said...

Remembering your beautiful boy with you.

WarsawMommy said...

Beautiful baby. Gorgeous.

Tracey - Just Another Mommy Blog said...

Sending you love, hon...

Maggie, Dammit said...

He's beautiful.

Love to you, mama. On this day and every day.

Titanium said...

In his eyes, there are the memories of trees and sky. My heart quivered and overflowed, just sharing this moment with you- with him.

I can't explain- except to say, your pain is felt, your heart is heard.

Christine said...

Your writing is amazing. And Elijah was absolutely, breathtakingly beautiful. Just looking at him makes me smile. So sorry for your loss. I am a faithful reader who is in your corner.

Anonymous said...

Gwendomama, If you haven't been over already, come see the rest of us at www.glowinthewoods.com - more mamas who know exactly what you're talking about when you say "invisible children" or "dead baby ashes" because all of us have our own. Come sit with us a bit.

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