Sunday, May 25, 2008

Too Many Punchlines

SO...this is an actual for reals chat conversation that I had with my friend, the Boss Of Seattle. We only talk once or twice each day, so it is with great gratitude towards g-chat that I am able to have contact with my friends throughout the day, so that tidbits like this do not go forgotten.

9:58 AM BOS: kate told me that she gets term papers with emoticons and
OMG's and shit like that
9:59 AM me: no
BOS: yes she had to find out what lol meant and then tell said
student that they needed to write the WHOLE word
10:00 AM and no rotating hearts or happy faces for reals
so fucking funny
10:01 AM then after a little light hearted convo last eve she said
something like this " so change of subject, do you mind? How do I stick my
fingers in Eliot's ass? I mean I try but I just don't really know how to
do it"
10:02 AM any advice? I was busy peeing my pants so I couldn't give
her any advice then she said she had a couple of butt plugs she had never
10:03 AM I suggested she brim them out on a tray with dessert and say
something like "cake? and by the way how Do you use these things?
10:04 AM me: what? what?
BOS: fucking hysterical read it again
me: who is eliot and why fingers in the ass?
BOS: for real that was our conversation
10:05 AM her boyfriend who has erectile dysfunction i guess a
finger in the ass helps keep it up
me: yes so i have heard nice wish i had met her when i was
10:06 AM BOS: I had to stick a dish towel in my pants cause I was laughing
so hard I peed my pants and couldn't make it to the bathroom kitchen to
bath is a long way when midstream.

Obviously, the best morsel of this conversation is hard to determine. Is it the buttplugs on a dessert tray, or is it the dishtowel?

I am going to go with the dishtowel.
Because I have been to the BOS's house, and the kitchen is about this far from the bathroom:


Denise said...

omg too fucking funny

furiousBall said...

just like my granny used to say, dish towel peeing is a sure sign of humor

Jane said...

Oh Jesus, but that's funny. And your illustration of distance? Hysterical!

Jane said...

Um, G...Jane is my daughter and she was here all weekend. Every time one of my kids uses my computer, their name pops up like this. Oh well, Jane est moi (Dottynana...Lin)

jenijen said...

Hi incognito Lin!

I've heard this story several times and it keeps getting funnier.

Boss of Seattle said...

I want everyone to know that my house it a bit bigger than a wee doll house. It is at LEAST 10 steps from the kitchen sink to the bathroom. O.K. 5 steps. But that is a lot bigger than a doll house. Obviously if I lived in a doll house I would have made it. But who wants a wooden toilet anyway?...

lisagh said...