Sunday, December 30, 2007

More Than Too Much

Remember Kim?

Yes, well I do.
I did/could not go back for Kim's funeral because I could not afford it; I was afraid to leave my kids for too long; I was working too much.
Not three weeks later, I developed a toothache. The kind of toothache that has one realizing that their lack of dental insurance would be better spent on a plane ticket back east to visit Dentist Brother. But you know what? I suck. Because I could not fly back to deal with toothache when I could not cough up the money for a funeral. (so the tooth, it festers)

Umm...So...back to the right now....my aunt, Kim's mother, just died. Just now.
Completely unexpectedly.
Previously asymptomatic sudden onset (aka sudden Dx) Lung Disease. Never smoked.

Didn't want to go to the hospital to investigate her shortness of breath. Because, you know. Her daughter just died.

So, she finally relented. She went into the hospital. It was not a great Dx, but not a horrible one, you know, as far as these things go. And then? Tonight....my aunt just died. JUST DIED.

So now I will be flying back for a funeral and a root canal. Most likely with a two year old in tow.
Do you believe?

Pray for me if you do.
Actually, screw me.
Pray for my uncle. And my cousin.

And hey, IF THERE IS A god?

::FUCK YOU!::

sincerely,
gwendomama

5 comments:

Cindy said...

Jay-sus!! You've got a total nonbeliever praying for you--doesn't that count for extra? Ok, for just something? Given that I believe in nature, human kindness, and all that shit?

I'm so totally sorry for what you're going through. So sorry.

nailgirl said...

Well Christ on a bike. Here good thoughts coming your way babe! I am so so sorry.

Tricia said...

Jesus Christ! Happy Freaking New Year...

mamadaisy said...

damn it all to hell! good god, woman, you have had way more than your fair share. i'm so sorry to hear it.

just keep swimming, just keep swimming...

sending hugs and pseudo-prayers from florida.

phoenyx said...

Hey you Awesomama,
I am thinking about you so much lately. I just want you to know that I am here with you, and that you are in my prayers. I am sorry things are so crazy like this right now. You are amazingly strong and such a light to all who see and know you. Hang with it, Girl. Times like this pass, as you know, and we are all always together in our hearts. Feel it, know it. All my love, Ange