And This Is a Day I 'Don't Work...'

5:51 am - Wake up to Bubbles plaintively issuing his morning credo, "Mama. No say 'no ootine milk'! I want ootine milk.:
5:52 - remind Bubbles for the 18th time that no, I will not get him ootine milk because it is too early.
5:53 - Tell Bubbles that ootine milk has sugar bugs which will get on his teeth.
5:54 -6:18 - Repeat above statements until, after thrashing and protesting, Bubbles finally sobbingly settles on a pathetic bottle of water and falls back asleep.
8:25 - Wake up in panic that I must be at work early. Wrong day. Children both conspicuously asleep....hmmm. Try to sleep more.
8:31 - Unsuccessful with more sleep, turn to the idea of fresh pressed coffee as antidote.
8:32 - Sneak the ootine milk upstairs for the prince to find upon his awakening and lord save us all this morning.
8:45 - Enjoy OMG yum Steve's French with copious half&half and check email.
9:00 - Supergirl is up and ready for business.
9:02 - Cereal and toast with jam for Supergirl.
9:03 - More coffee and creamy toppers for mama.
9:04 - 9:24 Supergirl and I chat and I respond to emails until Bubbles wakes up (happily, because the ootine is there).
9:24 - 9:28 Chase Bubbles around the house with clothes and put them on his body.
9:30 - Brush teeth of Bubbles; attempt to brush his crazy hair but usually only one thing gets brushed on Bubbles at a time.
9:34 - Hand Bubbles some breakfast: juice, vitamins, and cereal in the car, as I buckle him into his carseat to go to speech therapy over in Beach Town.
9:35 - Beep horn for Supergirl to stop brushing her hair and get in the car already!
10:05 - Arrive at speech therapy five minutes late.
10:10 - Back into the car with Supergirl to run errands (boring hardware store and then, if there is no whining, a croissant!).
10:51 - SUCCESS! Croissant!
10:59 - Arrive at speech therapy just in time.
11:04 - Back in car, drive back to downtown for kids' counseling.
11:30 - Drop off child #1 for therapy while kid #2 and I get bagels across the street.
12:20 - Pick up child #1 and drop off child #2 for therapy.
12:25 - Take child #1 to nearby favorite park for some exercise and playtime.
12:26-12:46 - Try, unsuccessfully to do some coursework for school.
12:46 - Give up and chase child #1 around park and spin her on spinning things.
1:05 - Walk back to therapist office to retrieve child #2.
1:12 - Buckle up everyone, it's time for Trader Joe's now.
1:20 - 2:00 - Shop and argue with Supergirl about treats.
2:06 - Drive back up mountain.
2:07 -2:27 - Lively car conversation with such topics as: marriage, divorce, apologies, and consequences. And ear piercing.
2:28 - Pick up Supergirl's playdate.
3:00 - Finally back home.
3:01 - There is begging for treats. Much begging.
3:07 -Quiet now, as they consume sandwiches in order to win treats.
3:15 - Popsicles are dispensed, kids sent outside.
3:16 - Realize, as popsicles are returned to freezer, that the freezer isn't frozen. In fact, the whole fridge is dead.
3:18 - Hand out the rest of the popsicles.
3:20 - 3:30 - Clean out old fridge in garage.
3:30-4:00 - Shuttle salvageable food from giant magnet holder in my kitchen to working fridge in garage.
4:01 - Realize that there is a conference call for my class tomorrow for which I was supposed to have put in 3 hours of study time.
4:02 - Have a tiny little cry.
4:03 - 4:30 - Play on trampoline with Bubbles; attempt super stealth speech therapy techniques.
4:31-4:35 - Convince Supergirl and her friend to walk the full garbage cans up to the top of the road with me (Bubbles needs no coaxing).
4:38 - Get bribed (we'll rake! we'll fold clothes for you!) to take kids to the school playground.
5:20 - Come home, start dinner. Oops. Half the food spoiled in the freezer demise. What will we eat?
5:45 - Dinner: Cream-cheesy eggs, bacon, francese toast with homemade strawberry jam, watermelon and peaches. Side of carrots offered to appease my guilt.
6:10 - Send children outside to have adult phone call.
6:12 - phone call interrupted by chicken chasing.
6:14 -Phone call resumes.
6:16 - Phone call interrupted by Bubbles latest splinters.
6:17 Phone call resumes.
6:21 - Phone call aborted after chased chicken runs in house and poops in living room.
6:35 - Water new plants.
6:41 - Discover the fresh mud that the kids tracked in through house. Decide to water plants later.
6:45 - Playdate's mom arrives to collect her.
6:50 - Kids in bath.
6:51 - Vacuum. Again.
6:54 - Wash kids' hair.
6:58 - Hand out towels, drain tub.
6:59 - 7:15 - Dinner dishes.
7:16 - For the last time, we are out of popsicles, remember?
7:18 - PLEASE PICK OUT A MOVIE
7:19 - Attempt to pay bills.
7:21 - Change the movie.
7:25 - Requests for popcorn shall be answered.
7:30 - Popcorn delivered.
7:31 - Whining admonished (too bad you don't like nutritional yeast. eat the popcorn or don't.)
7:35 - MAMA - BUBBLES DUMPED THE POPCORN...
7:36 - 7:40 - Vacuum. Again.
7:41 - No, you may not have more popcorn. Or chocolate. No.
7:42 - Open Big House Red. Pour.
7:45 - Try to do some coursework. This is a multi-step process.
7:48 - Have all notes, CD's DVD's, laptop and piano keyboard ready.
7:52 - PLEASE LET ME DO THIS FOR JUST TWENTY MINUTES PLEASE!!!
8:00 - (pause) MAMA! I want OOTINE MILK!
8:02 - (play) Resume....
8:03, 8:05, and 8:06 - Ignore phone calls.
8:07 - (pause) Phone again. Answer. I've got nothing but love for the relentless caller.
8:08 - (play) Resume....
8:11 - MAMA! Bubbles peed on the floor!!
8:11 - (pause) Run out of house and hide in the garage for three minutes.
8:14 - Clean up Bubbles. And his pee.
8:20 - Brush kiddos teeth.
8:24 - Tell Supergirl to wash her hands again after putting the chickens to bed.
8:30 - Lights out and blankets for rest of movie.
9:04 - JACKPOT! Bubbles passed out on couch, transfer to bed.
9:05 - 9:12 - Read one book to Supergirl and tell her she can read for 1/2 hour (it's Summertime!)
9:12-9:30 - Clean bathroom next door and clean out some cupboards. Wonder why he saved 23 empty shampoo bottles.
9:30-9:45- (play) Resume.
9:46- (pause) Turn off lights for Supergirl.
9:46-9:50 Snuggle; fight sleep.
9:51 - 10:02 - Make lesson plans for tomorrow's music classes, for tomorrow is a Work Day. You know, unlike today.
10:02 - 10:40 - Enjoy late night and very humorous phone conversation with the BOS.
10:45 - Load up car with instruments, keyboards, drums, parachute, CDs and lesson plans.
10:50 - Pack breakfast snacks for the kids who will most likely try to sleep later than I need to leave.
10:59 - Attempt to write but give up and read blogs instead.
11:21 - Brush, wash, snuggle, sleep.

Prepare to repeat.


(Other than the fact that child support would be awesome.....we're managing just fine....)