Friday, March 14, 2008

I see him in the clouds, and in the faces of luckier children

Today at the market I saw a baby who looked very much like Elijah.
I never see babies who look just like Elijah. But this baby looked like a bigger, healthier Elijah.
He was five months old, and he looked like a very chubby five month old baby.
His eyes were shining blue, but deep set beneath his prominent brow. His cheeks were exceedingly large and...well...cute. His mouth was a tiny little rosebud. His hair was abundant and blond and curly. He was....lovely.

The family was right behind us. They kept smiling back at me but I think my stares may have become a bit too intense for them. It was hard to not stare at a baby like that.

But impossible to talk to them. Can you imagine? 'Oh, I am just staring at your gorgeous son because he looks just like my son. Which one? Well....he died. I must leave quickly now.'

I just told them that I thought he was incredibly beautiful.


Denise said...

Oh how did you resist the urge to reach out and touch him? Hugs babe.

Shannon and Carey said...

Wow. I wish it would have been me and you could have said something to me. I would have sat with you.
Hugs to you also.
-Shannon in Austin

Azul said...

I found your blog via Amalah's advice smackdown.

What can a stranger say to you that won't sound trite, or be the wrong thing to say? What can one mother say to another who has suffered the cruelest loss of all?

I don't know, but I had to say something. I hope that peace will find its way into your heart this night, if only for a moment.

Anonymous said...

God sincerely spoke through that child - he wanted you to see your little boy again. HUGS to you.