Today, as if the universe sensed I needed something, I received a gift.
I received an email from a woman named Kara. She said that she had been lurking for a while, and that her son was born still, one year ago next Monday. I wanted to reach through the words for a person and hug her when I read that. I wanted to find a way to find her and give her something, not sure what, to help her get through next week.
But she went on to tell me that she had had a dream she needed to share with me.
A dream about Elijah.
People often voice their concerns over the potentially negative effects of posting pictures of our children on our websites. Today I can share with you a beautiful and unforeseen result of having posted the pictures of Elijah: He was recognized in another person's dream as being Elijah. And while she had only pictures of a small baby in her mind, she dreamed about my son, who was recognizable to her as a radiant, laughing toddler.
Some believe that all dreams are prepared for us by our own subconsciousness. I am not one of them.
Kara prefaced her email with a kind disclaimer: she had not gotten too far into my archives and was not aware of my beliefs or background. I found this to be respectful, but in the end, irrelevant. My beliefs are not relevant to her dream; I have no reason to believe anything other than the dream, and thank her for sharing it with me.
"I just recently found your blog, probably a couple of months ago, and I have only been able to go back and read so much of it in my spare time, so I am not 100% versed in your beliefs, background, etc. But I felt the need to reach out to you because I had a dream about your Elijah. I don't know what it meant, and I don't know why because I hadn't checked your blog for a few days, and what I had most recently been reading about were your other children, and not specifically about Elijah. But, I wanted to share with you so you know that he is in many people's lives and touching people's hearts all over, even though his time with you was too short.
I can't remember how the dream started, but all of the sudden, Elijah was there, in front of me. He didn't look too small for his age, he didn't look like he had any trouble growing or thriving, and he was very healthy, and he had been running around playing. He looked about 2-3 years old: chubby, rosy cheeks, big beautiful curls in his hair, his eyes sparkling with joy and laughter. He looked so happy and amused and just wonderful; almost like he was about to start laughing hysterically. He was wearing khaki corduroy overalls, and a blue and green long-sleeved shirt...not sure why I recall that detail...
I don't know if he came to me so that I could tell you about how he is. Or, I often wonder if he came to me to show me that where he is now there is nothing but healthy, happy children. Because my son was so sick prior to his birth, I wonder how he is now, and maybe Elijah was trying to assuage my fears. I can't be sure. But whatever the reason, I want you to know that I saw him, and he was just beautiful and healthy. And whatever the message, I am grateful he stopped by because he made me smile and he gave me hope."
I have read this very slowly, three times.
I continue to read it slowly.
I asked her if his shirt was striped. It was. So I knew it was Elijah.
Each time I read it, I experience something I never could have without this gift: The vision of Elijah as a healthy, robust, active, growing, and alive child.
The gift of knowing that his life continues to touch others is immeasurable.
Thank you, Kara.